Monday, 11 July 2016

Detoxing (Or How I Ate Nothing But Fruit)

So I mentioned on Friday I was going to detox over the weekend and that I was getting a blood test. I haven't gotten the test results back yet so I figured I'd talk about the detoxing first. I actually forgot to ask when I would get the results back. I'll give them a call in a few days if I don't get a letter. Just a warning folks. This post will possibly get a little gross. So feel free to just skim or skip it.

For some reason searching "You were warned" brought up a lot of "America is fucked!" stuff
It was less of a detox and more a bit of a cleanse, for lack of a better word. Basically my system has been a bit clogged lately. Or it's really felt like it. I also know that junk food is kind of like a drug in a way. The more of it you have in your system the more of it you want. It becomes almost a dependency. So I had to get it out and in order to do that I chose to employ fruit.

See a friend of mine told me about something she called the "fruit cleanse" a few years ago. Basically you just eat fruit for a few days. It's not starving yourself but at the same time you're not really taking in any fat but you are taking in enough carbs and calories to have energy and fruit is surprisingly high in fibre too so it helps, well, cleanse. I've only tried it once.

It really hurt and I almost never left the bathroom.

This time it went a bit different. It actually didn't have much of an effect. Maybe I didn't do it for long enough? Or I ate too much fruit? Though in my experience eating too much fruit, even if I eat other things, can have the same effect. All I know is that, outside of feeling incredibly hungry for a while, it didn't have much of an effect this time. I suppose I should try and do it for a few more days but, yeah, it just hurt my stomach.

I suppose there's always the chance my body isn't as fucked as I thought but I highly doubt that's the case. Constipation is not the sign of a healthy body. Now to wait for the blood test results I guess.

Oh well.


  1. Well, fruit by itself doesn't make for a nicely balanced diet, so of course your body isn't going to like it. And if you're eating a shitton of fibers, well yeah, brick shit will be shat. Just keep it balanced and consistent, that's way more effective.

  2. Fang is right of course. And if you want some effective fruit laxative, eat a couple of stewed prunes before bedtime. But don't overdo it! They are powerful little fuckers.

  3. I eat a lot of fruit normally but never tried just fruit for days. Good luck with the blood test anyway.

  4. Hmmm, not sure I have much to add. I tend to drink a lot of water, that seems to keep the system flushed.

  5. I love fruit so I would do ok with eating nothing but fruit

  6. This sounds like quite the challenge!

    I'm starting a pizza cleanse tonight. Nothing but pizza for three days.


Don't forget to subscribe to comments so you know if I say something back. If you want that is.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...