Friday, 19 June 2015

"It's A Gi- I Mean, Boy!"

This post is inspired by a comment I left at Crazy, Tragic, Almost Magic. Michael made a post about her name, and what it's like being a girl with a name generally given to boys. I told her that there was a fun little story about my name and that I would make a post about it. I think it's a story I've told before but when you get to blog as long as me you end up repeating some things. Embarrassing stories from your childhood being one of them.
Though I'm not sure how embarrassing this will actually be. 
When a woman is pregnant she can have an ultrasound to tell her the sex of the baby. A lot of parents take this option so they can buy clothes and decorate in advance and do all of that stuff. My parents took the good doctor up on their offer and they were informed that they were not, in fact, going to have a healthy bouncing boy.

No, they were told they were going to have a girl. 

For reasons I'm not quite sure of (I assure you I have a penis) my parents were told that I was a girl when she was pregnant. I'm told they bought dresses and possibly even had a pink room all ready for me. Obviously when I was born the doctor noticed I had a penis and that someone had messed up somewhere. Instead of having a beautiful baby girl my parents had an ugly baby boy.

According to my birth certificate despite the fact I was born in May I wasn't actually named until June a few weeks later. I asked my mum about it and she says that basically my name was chosen on a whim. They couldn't decide on a name and were just like "Fuck it, we'll call him Mark." And thus the greatest writer the world has never known was Christened.

Well, I was Christened not long after I guess.

But there you have it; my name was chosen on a whim because my parents were confused as I was supposed to be a girl. Some people would say that explains a lot about me and even question how wrong the doctor who said I was a girl was. I'm not one of those people as I'm happily a white male cisshitlord as Tumblr would put it.


  1. A boy is prized in Asian cultures so you would've been good news there!

  2. Fun story! I've never known a woman named Michael except for the actress who played the mother on the Waltons. She was always billed as "Miss Michael Learned" to make her gender clear, I guess.

  3. Are you on tumblr? Well, that is some story about the origin of your name. I think the most unoriginal way to name a baby is to give them the same name as their dad like my parents did.


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