I really am in for some busy times now. Tomorrow I have to go in to town to do some things, and I'll probably be up there for a few hours (at the least) and on Friday I have therapy which means being in town again for a few hours and next Monday I have yet another busy day in town including a dentist visit. If that wasn't enough things are going to be busy at home too as I've almost finished editing my short stories, and I think I'm going to start editing Immortal Space too. I have 47 "chapters" to go through, so I can make a start before the story is actually finished itself. That's going to take a few months yet. If I'm still alive by the end of these two weeks, well then I'll probably release my short story collection. Like I said when they're done I'm probably going to have Fang read them (okay you can have a space in the sidebar with how much I mention you) but I'm also considering having someone remotely professional read through them too. Then they'll give me their honest opinion that the stories suck and are terribly written, I'll get depressed and cry for a bit, and they'll never be released. This also means I'll have to wait until the end of next week when I have the money to do so. Although if Fang says they're publishable then published they shall be! Just possibly under a pseudonym in case things go wrong and I have to retry the whole "be an author" thing.
Well, anyway, have yourselves a merry little round up.
Tuesday was a post about things I've posted about more than enough; the prospect of holding down a job and how much even looking for one is damaging me, let alone actually having one. Part of me is getting back to the short stories so I can finish them, release them, and just walk in to the job centre one last time and say "I don't need your money, your contempt, and your passive aggression. I'm a published author now. Screw you guys, I'm going home. To write". There really are no words to describe the amount of joy that would give me. Until then I can appreciate slowly losing my mind.
Wednesday was a post about something a friend of mine recently asked me where she asked me first of all if I get scared I'll never meet "the one" and then she asked me if I ever get lonely. The answer to the first question was "no", as I do not believe there to be a time limit on such a thing, and I don't believe I have the capacity to truly love. The answer to the second was "yes" because everyone gets lonely sometimes. My loneliness flared up a little over the past week even but meh, I'm a big girl. I know how to end the loneliness if I really want to. I figure if I really wanted to, I would have done so by now.
Thursday was the latest edition of my podcast. You'd think after this long it would at least have a name. Well anyway what was discussed included my most recent therapy session, and how I opened up about something, and some of my thoughts on the writing process. Oh, I remembered what I talked about with writing now. I went and wrote a fanfiction. A fanfiction that has, at the time of writing, 688 views, 47 upvotes, and 37 comments. Which is legitimately more than anything I've ever written. So I don't mind so much that I did it. It was quite the ego boost so many people read and enjoyed it. Also included at the end is me singing a song. Even though I said I was never going to sing again in a podcast, I've been thinking a lot about trying it again. Don't ask me why, I don't know why I would subject you, my slightly less loyal subjects, to such audio torture.
Friday was an incredibly emotional post in which I answered the question "so, just what's wrong with you?". My therapist asked me to write down what I feel are the biggest problems in my life right now, and so I decided to post what I had written. Because I like to make my insanity public. Those problems are as follows:
That I've used and manipulated to people a lot, even if I wasn't aware I was doing it at the time (yes that's possible) it still doesn't change how I feel about the fact I did it.
My sexuality, which is as ambiguous as ever and possibly non-existant
My lack of motivation and drive, which is fueled by my depression, which is caused by the aforementioned things, and possibly some more.
Saturday was NOT an Immortal Space update because I hadn't written one, having spent all my week editing (and adding to) short stories and writing fanfictions about technicolour ponies. However after gentle nudging from Fang (see you got mentioned AGAIN) I decided to write one on Saturday instead. However on Sunday I posted the prologue to a new story I plan on working on in my spare time, that so far has no title. It's about a boy called Caspian Crenshaw who dreams of becoming a pirate. More details about that story coming up tomorrow.
Sunday was the Immortal Space update that I did indeed manage to write on Saturday. It's another look in to a bit more of Trent's past. I think we can have one or two more of these, then a bit more plot and potentially filler, and then we move on to the final storyline. Wheeeeee! Look at me, teasing things all over the place.
And that was my week. I hope you had a good one, and have a good one this week too.
Something tells me I may not have such a good week.