So, naturally, I didn't.
Instead I listened to some Phil Collins, which, again, I have no understanding of. I love Phil Collins, but a lot of his music is quite depressing. Which I guess kind of explained it really. It was probably better than listening to H.I.M. Just mentioning some of their song titles to someone made them think I was suicidal. They have songs called things like Join Me (In Death) and Funeral Of Hearts and And Love Said No which has a line that goes "Kill me, I cried and love said no". Anyway, that's not really the point. I also talked to an old friend which was pretty good. She's an ex-blogger and it's been a while. She's actually a revived blogger and can be found at http://leahsnotes.blogspot.co.uk/. That's right, it's our good friend Leah, she's back. Which is awesome news, and did put a smile on my face. I'm surprised it didn't crack.
So, the cause of all this stress? Well for a start I bought a new laptop with some help from my dad and it's my Christmas present and it's not as good as I thought it would be. It's odd for a computer to have a 1TB hard drive, and 8GB of RAM and still underperform, especially because it can't hold a candle to a laptop I had before that was half was powerful (500gb hard drive and 4gb RAM) and so I feel like I wasted my dad's money and I'll pay him back eventually and deal with this laptop for a while. It's a good little machine, but I mostly use my computers for gaming, and the graphics card isn't as good as I thought it would be.
Anyway, that's like about a quarter of it. The rest of it is that today is when I have my next therapy session and I'm just stressed and scared over that. I'm sure I'm going to leave it feeling fine, and I know it's all going to help, but that doesn't make me any less afraid of it. I'll be sure to let you guys know how it goes though.
Add in the fact I also talked to someone I shouldn't have and feel like I let Jessica down and you have quite the fucking pity party in my pants and no one is invited.
But remember that our awesome friend Leah is back at http://leahsnotes.blogspot.co.uk/. Because I'm a filthy filthy whore and she's worried people will have forgotten her.
|Because I hate staying depressed just look into his lovely face and remember life is worth it because he is alive :D|