So I said that I went to the shop I used to work at and that I would write a post about it. Seeing how I don't have anything better to write about, or anything else actually, this will be that post.
So, the first time I went back it was right after my therapy session. I really had been avoiding the place, and I didn't really realise how apprehensive about the place I was before I decided I was going to go in, and was suddenly hit by a lot of nerves. It was a rather weird flux. On the one hand, I didn't really want anyone in there to talk to me, but on the other I did. I'd have felt terrible if no one really remembered me in there. I was also worried that my boss would be there, and he would tease me about how long it's been. It's not exactly the first leave of absence I've ever taken and he always teased me when I came back. Like I was some kid who ran away from home but he always knew would come back. Well, I did walk in, obviously, and I had a walk around the store. One of the people I did know there was on the till, and she was the only person on the shop floor. A woman was having trouble with a toy (it took batteries but didn't appear to do anything) and even though I was tempted to try and help I left it to the actual employee. When that was sorted, I took the game I bought to the counter and she asked me if I still had my employee discount (I always hated using that thing, I felt like I was cheating the kids out of their charity money) and I said it's best not to. That was all the discussion that really happened between us. Oh, she also told me that she had seen me and my dad eating together. But that was all really. After that I left the store feeling moderately good about how everything went really. I didn't go in to the backroom though, which is going to be another major step really.
The other time I went in was Saturday. My niece needed a copy of the book Of Mice And Men (great book by the way) and so I volunteered to have a look in the charity shop, using it as an excuse to go in again. Again I didn't go in to the back room, and again I didn't really talk to anyone, but I did buy an adorable seal teddy and a Disney keyring I plan to give my sister for Christmas. The keyring that is, the seal is all mine. One thing that was different though was that the assistant manager was there. Now, I did prefer him to his boyfriend at times, and I would say overall he was nicer to me, but I wasn't really close with anyone there. He just said hi to me, and asked me how I was, I said I was doing okay, and it was as simple as that really. Once again, I left feeling kind of good about how things had gone, but knew they could have been a lot better. Still, it was at the cash register and it's not like I could have struck up a full blown conversation with the guy.
Overall it was odd realising just how afraid of the place I was, but I still went in, so I guess that's good.