Monday, 11 June 2012

No One Saw This Coming

I'm going to do something today that no one ever thought I would actually do. I'm going to take a day off. Kind of. Everyone says I can take one if I want, so I'm going to do it for once. I can't totally take a day off though. I'm still going to read blogs today, and well, I'm writing this aren't I? I'm also going to give you something to listen to. It's our Lord and Master Darren Hayes.

Man this guy can always make me smile
You ever get the feeling that your commitment to never being broken, and to always staying alive is just seen as a test by whoever runs this place? That every time you say won't be beaten something gets the idea to hit you harder than before? I do. It seems to be that way. Sometimes I do want to have a conversation with God, and just ask him what the fuck it's all about. Why did this happen, why did that happen. If you're trying to make me stronger then why not stop when you saw I was only getting weaker. Why do you want to break me so damn badly?

This is not goodbye either. Sometimes I don't think I'll ever be able to give this up. I guess I just got tired of pretending everything was fine.

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