A good friend of mine who I love to pieces recently went through some very bad times, and found herself regretting some of the things she did. I'm not going to go into details, it's her story to tell, and I don't see her telling it (I didn't even get the full story but that's partly because there were bits of it that were "need to know" and I didn't need to know). But it got me thinking about regret, and it's something I may have covered before, but when you're as forgetful as me, you'll find yourself talking about something more than once. Frankly I'll be amazed if this is the first time I've done it. Anyway, regret.
I'm not going to say don't regret anything, because no one can do that. I'm just going to say try not to regret. You're going to regret things sure, but accept the fact that they happened, and try to see that maybe some good came out of it. I've talked before about how my relationship really screwed me up, and is still killing most of my chance for redemption, but I don't regret what happened, what I did. I don't regret getting with that girl. If I didn't get with her I would never ever have joined Facebook. I had no reason to until she told me to do it. Well, asked. If I had never joined Facebook I would never have met Jessie again after two years. It's now been nine years we've been together. That's a long time, especially for me. She's the only person I've been on a constant talking basis with for more than two years.
I've mentioned briefly about disastrous relationships since then. I'm not even sure you can call them relationships, but I don't regret those either. Or try not to. I came into those people's lives when they needed someone like me. I always have actually. It's kind of fun to think of yourself as some kind of agent of fate, that comes into a person's life when they need someone like you. Anyway, in my own way I helped improve their lives, or in the case of one person, I just got her through a rough patch so that she could go back to being a bitch. Either way I gave her a reason to hope, how she came out was not my doing. I wish she had ended up different but she didn't and I have to live with that just as much as she does. Though I don't have to live with it at all actually. We haven't talked in two years.
The only one of those I kind of regret is the one I'm still not sure wasn't a dude pretending to be a girl to get free shit from me. I don't mind giving people gifts though, plus I never gave her/him anything. I win. Kind of.
The general point is to try not to regret what you have done in your life, whatever it was. It happened, and that's it. You can either continue to be sad about it, or you can learn from it, or at least learn about it properly. If you regret getting into a relationship because it ended and caused nothing but pain, then think of what good happened to you during that time, or became of it. Or think about why it ended, if there was something you could have done, then do it next time. Help your next relationship truly blossom. If you regret getting physical with someone to early, then try not to. If they turned out to be a jerk, and it's over, then learn from it. Take it into the next relationship you have that you should wait more. Unless all you want is something physical I guess. Failed relationships help us grow as people, and bring us closer to that ultimate perfect relationship. Never forget as well that you can't choose who you love. That is something that I may potentially regret.
Also, talk to me more dammit! I can tell you what to take from things, and at the least I can give you a hug until the pain goes away.
By the way this isn't personally aimed at that friend. It's more for everyone. Though if you want to see it that way then feel free too. As long as someone gains something from this, I'll be moderately almost happy.