Thursday, 6 October 2011

Things School Didn't Mean To Teach You Part Deux

You may remember some time back I did a post called Things School Didn't Mean To Teach You, and I teased that there were four more, and then I did the Writing Challenge and none of the others ever got posted. Well, here's number two, and yes, sorry folks this is a serious post.

2. Once an outcast, always an outcast.
If you were like me, then first off let me pray for you, second, you were more than likely the outcast at school. No one really paid all that much attention to you unless it was negative attention, or people just didn't really seem to care about you, or finding out anything about you. In some rare cases, you can avoid being an outcast after being in school, but for the most part, every time you went to a new school after being an outcast, you probably told yourself that it would be different this time. But it rarely was. In every school I was at, I was pretty much an outcast, and I only had one or two friends. Real friends anyway. Even when I left school and started voluntary work, I was an outcast there too. I'm not involved much and people don't really talk to me. Though they say that I should talk to them first. It's a vicious circle.

But, you know, this wasn't so bad really. Except for the negative attention part. Being alone in school kind of helps you appreciate your own company, and learn to rely on yourself. I see people with a huge circle of friends, and I find myself wondering what they're like when they're on their own, how they would react if all of a sudden they stopped being popular. I'm not saying everyone with a lot of friends is the kind of shallow person that can't stand their own company, but that bimbo of a cheerleader that is popular because every guy wants to get into her pants and from what you hear, most of them do. Her? Yeah she probably can't stand her own company. Hell at my school there was a video being passed around of a girl and her dog. Ahhh the joys of youth.

Although I'm not too great with my own company, I've met the real me, he's a prick. So even if you are an outcast, it's not all that bad for you, and if you have a lot of friends, don't forget to take time to love yourself to.

You ever wonder why Twilight Sparkle in MLP only has four friends? (if I've counted right, five if you count Spike, six if you count Celestia, seven if you count Luna but nobody does because she was just there for those first two episodes and then everyone conveniently forgot about her, and those magic necklace thingies, which actually made a comeback for the new season but Luna didn't) anyway the point I was trying to get to is that five is about a good number to have. They even did an episode dedicated to how a person can love all their friends equally when Spike was jealous of some weird owl he should have just cooked and eaten because it seemed Twilight loved the owl more than Spike. But if you ask me, this isn't the case. If you have a lot of friends, there's going to be times when some of them get let down. Though God only knows why a massive outcast like Twilight managed to amass such a gang of friends in the first place.

I really shouldn't have written a paragraph about MLP, now the comments are going to be full of people raging at me (I like MLP, no rage!), or just commenting about that rather than what I've actually said. But I can live with that. It just means more views for me.

51 comments:

  1. @The Angry Lurker I'm tempted to not answer that, but it's My Little Pony, and by mentioning it, I have ensured that I will get very few comments about the post itself, and most about that.

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  2. I was an outcast too so you're not alone.

    You're right though, it does teach you to love your own company and depend on yourself. One day the girl that gave me so much hell was all on her own and she looked completely lost! It was very satisfying to see.

    See? I left a comment based on what you wrote prior to the MLP part :P

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  3. My little pony lol :P
    Well I prefer having real friends to those that are just acquaintances

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  4. @Hazel It's a lesson I'm still learning though lol. Sometimes I feel like I have to be around other people. That must have felt pretty satisfying to see though. Yes thank you for making a non-MLP comment :P

    @Cricketfreak Yes I prefer that too, those are the keepers.

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  5. My little pony? i'll check that out LOL~

    I do feel like an outcast a lot... I really don't know why... a colleague once told me that people are intimidated of me (what? intimidated? i haven't even reached 5 feet for crying out loud!)

    But I strongly agree with what you said about friends. I made 6 good friends who are still my closest friends to this day. We've been friends for over 11 years ^_^

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  6. @Indistinctive Writer I wouldn't if I were you, for some reason girls don't like it. The latest series Friendship Is Magic anyway.

    I don't think people are intimidated by me but if you have six friends you aren't an outcast :) I've known Jesse for 8 years now, but we don't have the advantage of being as old as you :P

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  7. My Little Pony ;P lol. Well I don't know if I am an outcast, definitly not a classic one, but not that many friends.

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  8. You make some good points. I used to rely very much on the company of others, but having been home-schooled for two years, I haven't had any "real" friends I see frequently in two years.

    The bright side is that I actually like myself better now.

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  9. @Mo not many is a good number to have :P

    @Lemons Don't Make Lemonade I begged to be home schooled but no luck, so congrats :) From your blog you seem like a likeable person, I have friends just like you.

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  10. Being an outcast, loner, being bullied, it all brings on social anxiety, social awkwardness. Hence why it's a lot harder after that to fit in again.

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  11. @Fang As per usual someone has put into one sentence what I explained in about five paragraphs :P But yes that is the circle of social anxiety. I'm very anxious and awkward in social situations.

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  12. Fang said it perfectly.
    You make valid points, there are popular people that they probably can't stand being alone or their life would fall apart if suddenly they lost their circle.
    But still i don't think it's once an outcast, always an outcast. It is indeed a vicious circle but easily breakable. It's very easy to meet people and make friends. Perhaps you have your standards very high, or expect way too much of people. Just relax, talk to others, you don't have to talk 5 hours straight first time you meet em, but at least say hi, and a little small talk, that's the best way to get someone aknowledge your existence.
    Get out of your shell, you might be surprised how much you would enjoy if you tried to open up more.

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  13. I was never the outcast in school... but I was never in the Bimbo crowd either. I was the one that floated in all crowds. I spoke to anyone and everyone.

    I had a few close friends but went out with everyone if that makes sense.

    My few close friends didn't hang out with each other either.

    It's true! The way you are in school does sort of map out your life. Bimbo and Stoner are now my two closest friends. There miles apart in the personality chart and hardly see each other but I speak to both of them all the time

    What do they call people like me in school? Floater?

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  14. I was never the outcast in school... but I was never in the Bimbo crowd either. I was the one that floated in all crowds. I spoke to anyone and everyone.

    I had a few close friends but went out with everyone if that makes sense.

    My few close friends didn't hang out with each other either.

    It's true! The way you are in school does sort of map out your life. Bimbo and Stoner are now my two closest friends. There miles apart in the personality chart and hardly see each other but I speak to both of them all the time

    What do they call people like me in school? Floater?

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  15. I was never the outcast in school... but I was never in the Bimbo crowd either. I was the one that floated in all crowds. I spoke to anyone and everyone.

    I had a few close friends but went out with everyone if that makes sense.

    My few close friends didn't hang out with each other either.

    It's true! The way you are in school does sort of map out your life. Bimbo and Stoner are now my two closest friends. There miles apart in the personality chart and hardly see each other but I speak to both of them all the time

    What do they call people like me in school? Floater?

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  16. I was never the outcast in school... but I was never in the Bimbo crowd either. I was the one that floated in all crowds. I spoke to anyone and everyone.

    I had a few close friends but went out with everyone if that makes sense.

    My few close friends didn't hang out with each other either.

    It's true! The way you are in school does sort of map out your life. Bimbo and Stoner are now my two closest friends. There miles apart in the personality chart and hardly see each other but I speak to both of them all the time

    What do they call people like me in school? Floater?

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  17. I was just about to check the meaning of MLP and then I read the comments..

    never of heard. lol

    I'm not famous in school but I think most of my classmates do really know me..^_^

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  18. @ Hasidic Plumer Aye I've opened up over time and met some wonderful people, too many are caught up in the circle though, and I am still in there to a degree. I think if anything I expect too little of people. I don't see the point in talking to people who aren't willing to talk to me. This can be regarded as a problem and is something I should probably work on rectifying. I say people should give me a chance, and well, I should give other people a chance too.

    @Elise I hope the five comments was an accident :P I'm not sure what they would call people like you, I think you are a rare thing :) So that means you get to decide the name.

    @Mai Yang Well like I've said before, as a girl you wouldn't like it, despite it being made for girls lol. I think that's a good way to be, not standing out too much, but still known.

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  19. I'm glad the comments mentioned it, because I had no idea what MLP was.

    In school, I found that it I was quiet, I was the outcast. If I showed people my humor, I was the center of attention. I don't like either, so I tried to balance it out so I could be the best of both worlds. It worked out pretty well for me, I'd say.

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  20. I was sort of a loner in school, had a few friends tho

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  21. @A Beer For The Shower Well both of you guys seem pretty well adjusted, so whatever it was you did, it worked.

    @John Again, that's a good way to be.

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  22. This so true. Quite sad, of course, but also true and the truth has to be told.

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  23. I was an outcast once. Until I learned that I'm incredibly good looking. And that being arrogant actually makes you more popular. At first I was like "Does this really work?" But now I can't even count the times I've gotten laid by starting a conversation with some variation of "I'm better than you" or just "face!" And i'm totally serious here. If you behave like an arrogant prick, people just assume you got a reason for it. They don't even question your authority. It's a strange world we live in.

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  24. @Pieter Childhood years are a never ending cycle of sadness, grief, and school :P

    @Michael Westside You speak the truth there. A healthy ego is a very good thing. If you can act important and better than everyone well enough they will assume you are, bonus points if you actually are.

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  25. Thankfully my short stature made me a sem-outcast. People thought I was funny...like a clown...to amuse them.

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  26. @My 2 Pesos I don't anymore but it's still quite the hell hole

    @Copyboy Class clowns get mad respect, and typically get left alone. At least in my experience.

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  27. Once an outcast always a better developed person.

    Being an outcast helps you but if you think you wont find friends and form good bonds you're wrong. I was friendless in school and for many years after but I made some friends at a job I had and have been friends with them for years!

    School forces you to be around people your own age, at my (now ex) job I started dating a woman 20 years older then me, we hung out with a guy 6 years older them me and two girls that were 3 years younger than me (they met in highschool) and all of us would chat at work together, go bowling together (with the others signifficant others), have get togethers at eachothers places (playing board games and video games) and even went to a strip club together cause, why not!

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  28. @Bersercules Only well adjusted if you learn from it, you can end up either way, but I did make a great friend at school and we still talk and hang out eight years later. I'm not too fond of people my own age nah, or I wasn't back then anyway.

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  29. I was popular in school and even now with co-workers even though I still consider myself an outsider. Being an individual is something I value greater than being will liked or "cool." I think that's why people like me in the first place though. Honesty is rare and people respect that. It's easy being honest when you straight don't give a fuck. ha. that's my motto.

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  30. @MRanthrope One of the many things that is funny because it's true. Honesty is easy when you don't give a fuck. People appreciate honesty, to a degree, but they value people who are honest with themselves, and genuine, more. I think so anyway. Being an individual is always something you should treasure.

    @Intredasting Blog I didn't have many, but we both got out alive.

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  31. As they say (something like this): "One good friend is better than 20 acquaintances".

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  32. @Ipenka I think the ratio is a bit higher than that :P

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  33. I was somewhere in between outcast and semi-popular. I learned to enjoy my own company and the value of a handful of friends.

    One thing is for certain though, I always be myself. I never have done things just to fit in.

    MLP? really?

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  34. @Danjor21 Yes, MLP lol. That's pretty good, to enjoy your own company and still know the value of having others.

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  35. @Generally Disgruntled I don't know if I would go that far, I just get a laugh out of the show, and can appreciate the messages in the episodes. I see in it what the Bronies see but usually when I act like one, and tell Jessie she just doesn't get the magic of friendship, I'm mostly doing it for a laugh, I don't take it as seriously as a brony does.

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  36. Brohoof.
    I had no idea you were a brony. I am too. It's all good. Haters gonna hate.

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  37. @A Lunatic Pope Refer to the last comment lol, though I will take your brohoof.

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  38. I'd have to caution you about the way you view that "bimbo cheerleader" though. When your characterization sounds too much like a TV show character you should be prepared to admit that you're shortchanging someone.

    You know how I said we're predisposed to take comments on our likes and dislikes personally? We also see other people as generalized homogeneous groups.

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  39. @Henry This is true in most cases, I was generalised a lot, and I do it too. I'm flawed, all of us are really. Just because a girl is pretty and popular it doesn't mean she sleeps with everyone, she could be a genuinely good person.

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  40. I've never really been alone in school. In the early years of school I had a load of friends and they were all bastards, they treated me like crap. So then I found a new small group of friends.. that small group of friends are now my house mates.

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  41. The most important thing I learned in school is the fact, that school is almost totally useless waste of time.

    I also had only few friends in high school. I wouldn't even call most of them the "true" friends though. Last time I had those was in elementary school.
    It's funny, that one of them lives above me, but we hadn't spoke for like 3 years now. :(

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  42. i was a social outcast too. it used to make me sad, but now i am so glad that i didn't become pretty or popular until i was in my twenties, cuz i had time to grow a personality, feel empathy and compassion for others, and appreciate what i have. when i see the girls who used to torture me in high school now and they are fat and miserable, i can't help feeling grateful that i wasn't one of them.

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  43. WHY DO SO MANY GUYS WATCH MLP?!?!

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  44. MLP...seriously? oO
    Well, if you like it, I wont say anything about it.

    Anyway, i think that having "a small amount of good friends" is better than having more friends than you can count. I couldnt even remember all their names ^^

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  45. @Milky Good for you :) Glad it worked out okay

    @Bob lol yes it is that too, maybe you should try talking to them or something.

    @Kage (I'm a lazy fuck) That's very good :) This happened to most of the people who treated me like shit too. Most of the girls I knew are now pregnant, and possibly married because they married their baby-daddy. Though most of them were sexually active back then too.

    @Shaw YOU JUST DON'T GET IT MAN! I kid, I kid. If I'm honest I've never been able to explain why I watch it. Really.

    @Mekkor I'm not about to plaster ponies all over the place don't worry. That is indeed a better situation to be in :)

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  46. I love the way you randomly inserted My Little Pony into all of this. I've never watched it and never will except by coincidence but it was funny nevertheless.

    That is too bad about your school years, but to me it's just baffling how people can NOT enjoy their own company on occasion. Having friends is great, but sometimes they can really grate on your nerves. I've purposely sent people busy signals on my phone several times so that they'd leave me alone, but it started failing when they called my house phone, oops...

    Eventually they learned and people seldom call me anymore, heh heh.

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  47. @The Rambler lol it was kinda fun wasn't it? No one calls me because my phone is usually dead...because no one calls me so I never charge it. It actually spent nearly a week in pieces because I dropped it, it fell apart, and I just couldn't muster the effort to put it back together. I'm comfortable with my own company, but there is such a thing as spending too much time alone.

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